Sunday, October 7, 2007

CASTLE BUILDING TODDLERS


Oh deary me. There was much wailing and gnashing of teeth last month, when the most horrible report ever compiled about ME, by NICE, found that evidence based medicine was replaced by a diet of CBT, GET and other fluffy nonsense.

The figures were terribly gloomy. Just four years ago, the Canadians made a terrific piece about ME.

Now, we just have to do it with a version from prehistoric times. And as a result, fewer than one in two doctors actually belief this disease is for real.

The notion, that belief is something you do in church, has been completely lost on these boys.

This produced a torrent of angry missives to the nation BMJ editorial, and the other nonsense article about ME in the same blog.

Angry people from all over England raged furiously, saying that NICE should be made to use the internet, and learn how to read evidence from others than their CBT friends.

And that they must shred these so called peer reviewed, and non-evidence based stupidity from the CBT KINGDOM, and turn their speakers to mute, and subtitle their nonsense in Hippocrite, as maybe people who can still read that language, can make any sense out of these so called guidelines.

Oh for heaven’s sake. Yes, the Top Dog from the CBT Kingdom thought he was tremendous, when he was a 4 year old, particularly when he was building sand castles.

And yes, I understand that he is still a Castle Building Toddler. But times change. And we have moved on.

The trouble is, the CBT KINGDOM and their buddies at the GOBSART Institute of Excellence, haven’t.

Even children change and pass the time using the internet, but apparently they haven’t got TV yet in the KINGDOM, let alone a cordless phone or the internet.

And why should they?? They have just pocketed ELEVEN million POUNDS.

So they have proven to themselves, and the world, that you don’t need the internet to get rich and only think about yourself and your Castle Building Toddler friends.

Every week they rewrite the same article and change the font size or a dot here and there, and then tell their friends they have done more research to back up their Toddler training.

But they have never watched anybody with ME, let alone see what life with ME is like.

Why? Because that is depressing. The Castle Building Toddlers only really perk up when someone agrees with whatever rubbish they write or say.

Whenever someone else talks, and has a different point of view, they start to unpick the stitching in the sofa.

It isn’t that they have a limited attention span. They haven’t got one at all.

There is no solution to this. Forcing these Castle Building Toddlers and their GOBSART BUDDIES, to make proper guidelines, is a complete waste of time. Because that isn’t in their own interests at all.

The best thing I can suggest is not to worry too much.

The vast majority of doctors don’t read stupid guidelines anyway. And this is true.

But they all have an opinion anyway, one they won’t change unless they get ME themselves. And until then, no one is taking any notice of us.

My biggest problem is that the general public will react to the NICE report, and articles in the adorable TIMES, by redoubling their efforts to call us liars, lazy and other niceness, until they get tired of it all.

This will mean there’ll be even less money going to proper research, but no one cares, why should they want to cure us, or get us our lives back, and get us back at work??

They are called adults, but I’m afraid they are still just Castle Building Toddlers.

The message then is simple. Forget about NICE, and just tell them to go back to their beach, and other sand pitches.

Thanks for your help and inspiration Mr Clarkson. Much appreciated.

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