Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Lynn Gilderdale’s moving account of why she decided to end her life

From The Times
January 26, 2010

OK guys, I have something really important to say. I want to talk about something extremely private and personal to share with you, my closest friends. After many years of serious deliberation, I have pretty much come to a huge decision. I hope you will try to understand my reasons for this decision and even if you don’t personally agree with it I hope you won’t judge me too harshly.

I don’t know how to begin. I am just going to come out with it. Here goes, deep breaths. Basically I think some of you have known for a while I have had enough of this miserable excuse for a life, of merely semi-existing for the last 16½ years. I have had enough and I want to die. This is no whim and certainly not just because of the reactive depression diagnosed a few months ago. I am no longer on antidepressants because they weren’t doing anything for me.

I really, really, really want to die and have had enough of being so sick and in so much pain every second of everyday and, basically, one serious health crisis after another. I am tired, so very, very tired and I just don’t think I can keep hanging on for that elusive illness-free existence.


Anonymous said...


Anonymous said...

Times, Letters to the Editor, 27 January 2101

Sir, The tragic case of Lynn Gilderdale (“I really, really want to die. I’ve had enough of being in so much pain”, Jan 26) starkly exposes the dreadful situation that ME patients face in this country, especially for those severely affected. Having to cope constantly with a horrible physical illness and its unpleasant symptoms, day after day with no respite, leads to despair.

We are derided by the medical profession and the public, and made to feel like we are charlatans, work-shy malingerers who undeservedly claim paltry benefits that are barely adequate to survive on. This, too, leads to despair.

It is hardly surprising that so many ME patients have already taken their own lives in a country and world that does not care.

ME is real. It is a devastating illness that completely destroys lives. It deserves the same respect and care as any other serious illness, not derision and disrespect.

Keith Riley
Seaford, E Sussex

Anonymous said...


Dr Macintyre & the Gilderdale family discuss M E

Anonymous said...

nice post. thanks.


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